"Home for the Holidays," a phrase that seems to be repeated over and over again. Particularly at this time of the year. Why is there so much excitement in that phrase? Why is home so important?
I have four children, the two oldest are married and the other two are still at home. The oldest two who have been separated from us for a while, seem to have a need to check in with us as often as possible. My oldest daughter who lives in Provo, age 24, gets real excited when she and her husband have a day or two off from work and school and knows that the family is getting together. She will even cook a big meal, something she never did when she was home, to get us to go down to Provo to be with them for an afternoon. I need to check in with my mother every once in awhile. What is this need that everyone seems to have?
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| 50th Wedding Anniversary (click to enlarge) |
"And I, God, created man in mine own image, in the image of mine only begotten created I him; male and female created I them." (Moses 2:27) Thus when God created Adam and Eve and told them to be fruitful, and multiply and replenish the earth He created the first family on this earth. Families are important to our Father in Heaven. We gain strength through our family. If these facts are true, and they are, shouldn't we strengthen our families while we re here on earth, while there is still time?
An understanding of (the need for us to develop through each phase of plan of salvation) gives us a correct perspective of our life on earth. We then see mortality as a short but crucial phase in our eternal development and understand it as an environment in which we can experience joy while being tested as to our fitness for higher joys later. And, most important, we recognize it as a time for action, action which progressively brings our lives into greater harmony with eternal truth and thus with the fullness of joy. As we begin to grasp the fully intent of this light and knowledge, the importance of our actions and decision that we make in this life becomes a high priority item on our to do list. When this happens, our spiritual blinders begin to fall from our eyes and among other things, we desire to strengthen our families.
PATIENCE
The question then becomes "how do we strengthen our homes and families?" The way is a long one and there are stumbling blocks along the way. Perhaps the greatest stumbling block is learning to be patient. We as mortals tend to blame others for situations that are going on around us that are not to our liking; whereas, in most cases, if we would calm our thoughts and emotions, the problem would pass without incident. Driving on a highway is probably a classic example. When pulling up to an intersection with a person in front of us, if he doesn't pull out immediately after the light turns green, we as mortals seem to lose a quality of godliness and let emotions take control.
Being patient with our spouse would perhaps be the next stumbling block. Our spouse should be our best friend, the one we will live with for eternity. The relationship here should be one of patience, love, trust and understanding. These traits should also apply to our relationship with our children. If we develop and cultivate these attributes within ourselves, we would be a long way down the path that leads through the valley of patience.
LOVE
Another stumbling block is that of learning the eternal principle of love. No other principle is more important than that of love. It is an attribute of God and one we must therefore make our own if we are to achieve perfection. Love is basic to a happy home. Without it, no marriage can be happy; with it, all happiness is possible. Henry Ward Beecher once said, "If God taught us all truth in teaching us to love, then He has given us an interpretation of our whole duty to our households. We are not born as the partridge in the wood or the ostrich of the desert, to be scattered everywhere. But we are to be grouped together and brooded by love, and reared day by day in the first of churches, the family."
There are perhaps other stumbling blocks that will come our way, but if we could learn these two principles, that of patience and love, our homes and all that are around us would be much better off and we would experience more fuller the joy that is here in this phase of our eternal live. The earthly home should be a heaven in miniature, and should thus help prepare the family to live with our Heavenly Father. That thought parallels a quote from President David O. McKay when he said, "It is possible to make home a bit of heaven; indeed I picture heaven to be a continuation of the ideal home."
The idea that parenthood is next to goggled stresses the vital importance of the parents' task. Godhood implies an eternal concern for the welfare of the souls of men. Earthly parents assist God's purposes by their concern to further the welfare of the souls entrusted to their care, and particularly, in the case of Latter Day Saint parents, to help these souls return to our Father in Heaven.
The importance of the early years of life cannot be over-estimated. There are scriptures that tell us that it is the parents' responsibility to train our children in the ways of the the Lord. This phase of our eternal life is but a moment in eternity. But for each of us, the rest of eternity depends on this short span called mortality. And of this brief span of seventy years or so, for how long is the parent able to exercise guidance over his child and thereby hope to set his offspring's feet firmly on the path to salvation? It is therefore important for parents to realize that they will have an intimate relationship with their children for only a few years.
The child needs guidance. And don't ever think that it can be over-done as long as it is done in righteousness with patience and love. I have heard it said that a child could be driven from the home if he is subjected to too much guidance. I don't believe that if it is done in the right way, God's way. The power of example will probably be the greatest tool that anybody will ever have. Of all the teachings that parents give their children, none will be more important than the example they set. Our son, while he was on his mission, said in his letters several times that one fond memory he has is the family reading the scriptures together and because of it, the scriptures mean more to him now.
President David O. McKay once said, "A home is most beautiful when you find each person striving to serve the other." Wise parents do not leave their children to assume they are loved. They make it clear in word and deed. They show it and they say it. This also includes one's spouse. The home which is truly a heaven on earth is invariably inspired by this spirit. Strengthen your families every chance you get. The available time is at best short in which to do this. Do it now. Doit every day, thus making your earthly home a haven of happiness.
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| 50th Wedding Anniversary (click to enlarge) |
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